D-95 to D-94, my bottom between two chairs, as we say in French

I spent the day in Macau yesterday, braving the immigration officers who were telling me that I had overstayed my welcome (our visas are being renewed at the moment), to interview two big wigs from the confines of a luxury hotel. Life is tough.

But actually, life is tough. Nobody can really tell me what the future holds for our magazine, as no ads are coming in although the sales guys keep saying they will. I don't know who to trust, I don't know who has whose interest in mind, and I don't know how to get motivated about content that I don't even know will see the light of day. It's a tricky one.

So I just went through the motions of listening to a beautiful and engaging lady tell me why the most expensive cigar in the world should be in everyone's living room, and another very amiable man tell me why his new hotel will be the best thing to have hit Asia since... well, forever... All the while, I just kept thinking "what's the point?"

I feel a little deflated to say the least! But then again, I also wonder whether my sudden lack of interest in what I am doing might not be because it has been three months now since I started and my boredom has kicked in. Just as I can't seem to spend three years in one place without getting itchy feet, it seems that I can't seem to enjoy a job for more than three months. Which is why freelancing is soooo the way forward for me...

Then again maybe all of this is just a defense mechanism against the impending loss of my job. Wow, I might be credit crunched. Feels odd. And yet, I would rather just be fired right now than wait to find out what will happen...

At least today we are going to the theatre. That should help...